Post by FWInsidercom on Feb 6, 2007 15:52:33 GMT -5
SIN CITY - BigBOSS wants a pair of waiters who dropped a waffle near the BOB Ballroom on Sunday charged for shutting down Sunday Morning Chloroform and costing him lots of money and setting off a security scare, the likes of which haven't been seen since January 31 when Boston got all crazy over an "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" battery-powered LED board.
No one is investigating because it would be a complete waste of time and money. And they don't want to look like those retarded douchebags in Boston.
In a statement, BigBOSS chastised the "gorilla" (sic) attack by the STWF, even though it doesn't appear as though it was a real threat.
"Terror terror terror terror terror!" shouted BigBOSS when asked about the waffles. "Waffle waffle waffle waffle! We're all going to die!"
BigBOSS wants Comedy Central to foot the bill to prosecute the as-yet unidentified waiters who dropped the waffle, allegedly after busing a table. It is unknown if they are agents of the STWF.
BigBOSS is seeking City officials to charge the waiters with placing a hoax waffle and general untidiness. He is also planning a lawsuit against the unidentified restaurant, which operates out of the Riviera Hotel.
Outside of the Ballroom, fans held signs such "Free Breast Exams," "BOB 1:While Says This Sign Sucks," and "STWF = Parking Lot."
The kitchen squad eventually responded and carefully approached the waffle as one onlooker shouted, "Be careful, it might be STICKY!"
"He looked for a sign that was sticky with his fingers. It was a little bit sticky, but not very," said BigBOSS recalling what the kitchen squad member told him. "But then I realized he might be in on the cover up. Especially when Mully and Sculder showed up and confiscated the waffle."
"What waffle?" Sculder asked when asked about the waffle he was holding in his hand.
Because of the shutdown of the BOB Ballroom, fans lost out on the chance to see Kay Fabe vs. Queen Mylisiv, Pete Trable vs. Coma, Rob Van Spam vs. XXXtreme Machine, Mr. Paradox vs. Logonoa, Seth Harker vs. Pigeon and Silaconne M. Plants vs. Kurt Angel.
The postponed event is tentatively scheduled for this week. Tickets for the event will be honored as if it were a rained-out baseball game, except in this case it's a waffled-out wrestling show.
When asked why he overreacted, BigBOSS said that the waffle's location seemed suspicious.
"I mean, c'mon. What are the odds that they'd drop a waffle right in front of our door?"
As we spoke, a pair of people walked by with a plate full of food. It turns out there is an all you can eat buffet right down the hall.
"Seriously. It can't just be a coincidence," BigBOSS reiterated. "You don't drop a waffle here unless you want to scare our wrestlers and fans. We'll never forget what happened on SMC 36 and SMC 37."
Two weeks ago, Steve Studnuts was injured by four unknown assailants, buried in sticky waffles and put out of action. Last week, STWF sympathizers threw waffles at BOB fans during a match between Axl Van Halen and Dustbuster Boy.
Sunday Morning Chloroform airs somewhat regularly on Comedy Central at 4 a.m. every Sunday. Comedy Central apologized for the incident:
"We're sorry BigBOSS is a total moron."
Sin City officials said the waffles are harmless.
"It appears there was no intent to commit a crime, so Sin City Police have no reason to waste our time. But if anybody starts wasting doughnuts, then we may have a problem," said Lt. Brian Schmucko.
Living In Sin, BOB's next On-Demand event, will be rescheduled. So just ignore the date that's on the logo now, says BigBOSS.
"Memorize these magic words: Card Subject To Change, Date Subject To Change," BigBOSS said.
No one is investigating because it would be a complete waste of time and money. And they don't want to look like those retarded douchebags in Boston.
In a statement, BigBOSS chastised the "gorilla" (sic) attack by the STWF, even though it doesn't appear as though it was a real threat.
"Terror terror terror terror terror!" shouted BigBOSS when asked about the waffles. "Waffle waffle waffle waffle! We're all going to die!"
BigBOSS wants Comedy Central to foot the bill to prosecute the as-yet unidentified waiters who dropped the waffle, allegedly after busing a table. It is unknown if they are agents of the STWF.
BigBOSS is seeking City officials to charge the waiters with placing a hoax waffle and general untidiness. He is also planning a lawsuit against the unidentified restaurant, which operates out of the Riviera Hotel.
Outside of the Ballroom, fans held signs such "Free Breast Exams," "BOB 1:While Says This Sign Sucks," and "STWF = Parking Lot."
The kitchen squad eventually responded and carefully approached the waffle as one onlooker shouted, "Be careful, it might be STICKY!"
"He looked for a sign that was sticky with his fingers. It was a little bit sticky, but not very," said BigBOSS recalling what the kitchen squad member told him. "But then I realized he might be in on the cover up. Especially when Mully and Sculder showed up and confiscated the waffle."
"What waffle?" Sculder asked when asked about the waffle he was holding in his hand.
Because of the shutdown of the BOB Ballroom, fans lost out on the chance to see Kay Fabe vs. Queen Mylisiv, Pete Trable vs. Coma, Rob Van Spam vs. XXXtreme Machine, Mr. Paradox vs. Logonoa, Seth Harker vs. Pigeon and Silaconne M. Plants vs. Kurt Angel.
The postponed event is tentatively scheduled for this week. Tickets for the event will be honored as if it were a rained-out baseball game, except in this case it's a waffled-out wrestling show.
When asked why he overreacted, BigBOSS said that the waffle's location seemed suspicious.
"I mean, c'mon. What are the odds that they'd drop a waffle right in front of our door?"
As we spoke, a pair of people walked by with a plate full of food. It turns out there is an all you can eat buffet right down the hall.
"Seriously. It can't just be a coincidence," BigBOSS reiterated. "You don't drop a waffle here unless you want to scare our wrestlers and fans. We'll never forget what happened on SMC 36 and SMC 37."
Two weeks ago, Steve Studnuts was injured by four unknown assailants, buried in sticky waffles and put out of action. Last week, STWF sympathizers threw waffles at BOB fans during a match between Axl Van Halen and Dustbuster Boy.
Sunday Morning Chloroform airs somewhat regularly on Comedy Central at 4 a.m. every Sunday. Comedy Central apologized for the incident:
"We're sorry BigBOSS is a total moron."
Sin City officials said the waffles are harmless.
"It appears there was no intent to commit a crime, so Sin City Police have no reason to waste our time. But if anybody starts wasting doughnuts, then we may have a problem," said Lt. Brian Schmucko.
Living In Sin, BOB's next On-Demand event, will be rescheduled. So just ignore the date that's on the logo now, says BigBOSS.
"Memorize these magic words: Card Subject To Change, Date Subject To Change," BigBOSS said.