Post by jerri on Mar 12, 2009 12:23:13 GMT -5
[Jerri Li is watching Breakfast At Tiffany’s on a shit smeared TV set (Scatman loves to cover things with shit) to try and better appreciate BOB’s newest hardcore champion Hamster Girl. Audrey Hepburn is cute as a button, and a little princess in this film, you see. Holly Golightly, the character in the film, is sat in the sink after drinking too much. Jerri just looks confused.]
Jerri: So, what? This is just about some girl who eats peppered tomatoes and salad all day in-between shopping for diamonds?
[Behind her is a half naked man in a cowboy hat tied up in ropes struggling on a leather couch. The sweat on his skin sticks him to the upholstery and tears away like cellotape from paper.]
Johnny: Why do I have to be tied up while you watch a fucking romantic comedy?
Jerri: I’ll wrap razor sharp twine around your dick and slice it into pieces if you don’t shut the fuck up!
[He throws his hands up as best he can within the confines of the rope as if to say ‘nevermind.’]
Jerri: Stop acting up! I know when I told you I was a pro-wrestler you just kinda laughed… fuck, you even said ‘that’s just people making it look like they’re hurting each other.’ But I make it so much more than motherfuckers like Triple H or Ric Flair, I take this shit seriously. And that clowny bitch Hamster Girl has MY title… and ain’t no fucking way in God-hell I’m letting her keep that shit.
[Johnny, reeking of Old Spice and summery perfume rubbed onto him by Jerri, falls onto the wooden floor as he continues to try and escape from his ropey confines.]
Jerri: Alright, you’re getting restless… here comes the pain.
[She grabs a bunch of bamboo sticks and walks across to her latest boyfriend/victim. She pulls his right hand up before jamming one of the sticks down under one of his fingernails. He yelps like a dog being tugged on too hard at the leash.]
Jerri: I ought to drive this whole fucking bundle down your throat you fucking faggot. What’s wrong? You don’t like a woman in charge? How about this?
[She worms one of the bamboo canes into the edge of his eye socket until blood trickles out. He screams like he’s having an orgasm. Jerri walks over to her computer and plays some music before torturing Johnny within an inch of his life.]
Jerri: So, what? This is just about some girl who eats peppered tomatoes and salad all day in-between shopping for diamonds?
[Behind her is a half naked man in a cowboy hat tied up in ropes struggling on a leather couch. The sweat on his skin sticks him to the upholstery and tears away like cellotape from paper.]
Johnny: Why do I have to be tied up while you watch a fucking romantic comedy?
Jerri: I’ll wrap razor sharp twine around your dick and slice it into pieces if you don’t shut the fuck up!
[He throws his hands up as best he can within the confines of the rope as if to say ‘nevermind.’]
Jerri: Stop acting up! I know when I told you I was a pro-wrestler you just kinda laughed… fuck, you even said ‘that’s just people making it look like they’re hurting each other.’ But I make it so much more than motherfuckers like Triple H or Ric Flair, I take this shit seriously. And that clowny bitch Hamster Girl has MY title… and ain’t no fucking way in God-hell I’m letting her keep that shit.
[Johnny, reeking of Old Spice and summery perfume rubbed onto him by Jerri, falls onto the wooden floor as he continues to try and escape from his ropey confines.]
Jerri: Alright, you’re getting restless… here comes the pain.
[She grabs a bunch of bamboo sticks and walks across to her latest boyfriend/victim. She pulls his right hand up before jamming one of the sticks down under one of his fingernails. He yelps like a dog being tugged on too hard at the leash.]
Jerri: I ought to drive this whole fucking bundle down your throat you fucking faggot. What’s wrong? You don’t like a woman in charge? How about this?
[She worms one of the bamboo canes into the edge of his eye socket until blood trickles out. He screams like he’s having an orgasm. Jerri walks over to her computer and plays some music before torturing Johnny within an inch of his life.]