Post by CircularAnswer on Oct 6, 2006 0:44:39 GMT -5
DIMENSION Z, MANSION OF CHAOS RULER
4:33 P.M. LOCAL TIME
THE THRONE OF CHAOS
*A man with green hair and purple tights is slumped over in his throne, snoring softly. Written on the legs of his tights are the words "Paradox King". Cobwebs cover him. In front of the throne are multiple bizarre lifeforms, led by a man in black clothes and white facepaint. This man is Vespers, former announcer and current tour guide.*
Vespers: And this is the last ruler of the Dimension Z Hegemony, Sir Zeno. According to legend, he was so dismayed by the apparent demise of the wrestling promotion he fought in that he fell into a deathlike trance and never awoke. The legend goes on to say that if the organization is ever renewed, he will awaken and return to wrestle within it.
Tourist: What was the organization's name?
Vespers: Apparently, the initials were "B.O.B.".
*Sir Zeno opens his eyes, blinks several times, and rises to his feet, scaring the utter hell out of everyone. He scratches his armpit and dusts the cobwebs off of his pants, stretching far enough that every vertebrae in his spine cracks.*
Sir Zeno: Ah, that was a very good nap... *He sees the tourists, who are cowering.* What seems to be the matter?
Vespers: Well... the government's collapsed, you've become a legendary figure, and this is just a tourist attraction.
Sir Zeno: Oh? Round up the Parliament, I have several unpleasant things to tell them...
*A pager beeps in the pocket of Zeno's tights, and he takes it out. He then stares at it in disbelief.*
Sir Zeno: Holy crap, it's alive...
----
HOT SPRINGS, SOUTH DAKOTA
9:24 A.M. LOCAL TIME
AMOCO GAS STATION, EAST WALL
*On the outskirts of town, a man in a mesh coat and fedora is slumped against a wall, a bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand. Every once in a while, he takes a swig. On one side, a sword is propped against the wall, and on the other side is an old man in tattered rags.*
Old Man: It's like I was saying, there's not only no free lunch, you even have to pay for the water. You had a good run in that BOB place, but now you're just like me, a washed-up punk sitting at a gas station and wondering what might have been. It's karma, my man - I fucked goats, you killed people. Both of us paid for it.
*Rather than answer, the man in the mesh coat takes another swig and sighs. A pager then goes off in his coat pocket, and he pulls it out. He blinks twice.*
Mr. Paradox: Holy crap, it's alive.
*He takes his sword, kills the old man, and walks out of town with the blade over his shoulder.*
----
DIMENSION G-4, QUEEN'S PALACE
6:41 P.M. LOCAL TIME
MAIN OFFICE
*A few pounds heavier and a little less amiable, Queen Mylisiv is currently signing any piece of paper that crosses her desk. One of the servants comes too close and is picked up, signed, and tossed in the outbox. After the last form is finished, she sighs and leans back in her chair.*
Queen Mylisiv: Done at last... Gods, I miss the good old days of the Brawlers on a Budget circuit. At least there I could pummel someone and make money for it.
*The ever-familiar pager goes off, and she retrieves it from... between her breasts? Handy storage spot, that.*
Queen Mylisiv: Holy crap, it's alive. *The pager beeps again.* Holy crap, HE'S alive!
*And out of the office she goes, either to get her job back or get laid, your guess is as good as mine.*
----
TIJUANA, MEXICO
8:24 A.M. LOCAL TIME
A DISUSED LAVATORY IN THE BACK OF A CONDEMNED BUILDING
*The sound of screams, a Wet Vac, and squishy noises all fill the air as the plastic surgeon named Dr. Thrilla is hard at work. The camera enters the lavatory just as the toilet flushes, and a bloody man staggers out, hand over his stomach. Dr. Thrilla cleans up his hands and walks out, shaking his head. Hanging on one wall is the Thrilla Life outfit, covered in dust.*
Dr. Thrilla: *Nostaglic metal clanging*
*He collapses into a chair, staring up at the ceiling. Cecil, meanwhile, is busy counting pesos.*
Cecil: We have just enough to eat tonight.
Dr. Thrilla: *Dismissive metal clanging*
Cecil: I know you don't care, but we do need to live, you know.
Dr. Thrilla: *Pessimistic metal clanging*
*A pager goes off, and Dr. Thrilla fumbles around in his scrubs until he finds it. His eyes widen.*
Dr. Thrilla: *Shocked metal clanging*
*He drops the pager, grabs the Thrilla Life outfit, and storms out of the building. Cecil picks the pager up and looks at it.*
Cecil: Holy crap, it's alive.
*He follows the doctor out.*
DIMENSION Z: IT LIVES.
SOMEWHERE
SOMETIME
SOME PLACE
Alex "Meat-Puppet" Smith: Oh, come on! What about me? Don't you care about the zombie? Come on... help a brother out...
*Fade to black.*
4:33 P.M. LOCAL TIME
THE THRONE OF CHAOS
*A man with green hair and purple tights is slumped over in his throne, snoring softly. Written on the legs of his tights are the words "Paradox King". Cobwebs cover him. In front of the throne are multiple bizarre lifeforms, led by a man in black clothes and white facepaint. This man is Vespers, former announcer and current tour guide.*
Vespers: And this is the last ruler of the Dimension Z Hegemony, Sir Zeno. According to legend, he was so dismayed by the apparent demise of the wrestling promotion he fought in that he fell into a deathlike trance and never awoke. The legend goes on to say that if the organization is ever renewed, he will awaken and return to wrestle within it.
Tourist: What was the organization's name?
Vespers: Apparently, the initials were "B.O.B.".
*Sir Zeno opens his eyes, blinks several times, and rises to his feet, scaring the utter hell out of everyone. He scratches his armpit and dusts the cobwebs off of his pants, stretching far enough that every vertebrae in his spine cracks.*
Sir Zeno: Ah, that was a very good nap... *He sees the tourists, who are cowering.* What seems to be the matter?
Vespers: Well... the government's collapsed, you've become a legendary figure, and this is just a tourist attraction.
Sir Zeno: Oh? Round up the Parliament, I have several unpleasant things to tell them...
*A pager beeps in the pocket of Zeno's tights, and he takes it out. He then stares at it in disbelief.*
Sir Zeno: Holy crap, it's alive...
----
HOT SPRINGS, SOUTH DAKOTA
9:24 A.M. LOCAL TIME
AMOCO GAS STATION, EAST WALL
*On the outskirts of town, a man in a mesh coat and fedora is slumped against a wall, a bottle of Jack Daniels in his hand. Every once in a while, he takes a swig. On one side, a sword is propped against the wall, and on the other side is an old man in tattered rags.*
Old Man: It's like I was saying, there's not only no free lunch, you even have to pay for the water. You had a good run in that BOB place, but now you're just like me, a washed-up punk sitting at a gas station and wondering what might have been. It's karma, my man - I fucked goats, you killed people. Both of us paid for it.
*Rather than answer, the man in the mesh coat takes another swig and sighs. A pager then goes off in his coat pocket, and he pulls it out. He blinks twice.*
Mr. Paradox: Holy crap, it's alive.
*He takes his sword, kills the old man, and walks out of town with the blade over his shoulder.*
----
DIMENSION G-4, QUEEN'S PALACE
6:41 P.M. LOCAL TIME
MAIN OFFICE
*A few pounds heavier and a little less amiable, Queen Mylisiv is currently signing any piece of paper that crosses her desk. One of the servants comes too close and is picked up, signed, and tossed in the outbox. After the last form is finished, she sighs and leans back in her chair.*
Queen Mylisiv: Done at last... Gods, I miss the good old days of the Brawlers on a Budget circuit. At least there I could pummel someone and make money for it.
*The ever-familiar pager goes off, and she retrieves it from... between her breasts? Handy storage spot, that.*
Queen Mylisiv: Holy crap, it's alive. *The pager beeps again.* Holy crap, HE'S alive!
*And out of the office she goes, either to get her job back or get laid, your guess is as good as mine.*
----
TIJUANA, MEXICO
8:24 A.M. LOCAL TIME
A DISUSED LAVATORY IN THE BACK OF A CONDEMNED BUILDING
*The sound of screams, a Wet Vac, and squishy noises all fill the air as the plastic surgeon named Dr. Thrilla is hard at work. The camera enters the lavatory just as the toilet flushes, and a bloody man staggers out, hand over his stomach. Dr. Thrilla cleans up his hands and walks out, shaking his head. Hanging on one wall is the Thrilla Life outfit, covered in dust.*
Dr. Thrilla: *Nostaglic metal clanging*
*He collapses into a chair, staring up at the ceiling. Cecil, meanwhile, is busy counting pesos.*
Cecil: We have just enough to eat tonight.
Dr. Thrilla: *Dismissive metal clanging*
Cecil: I know you don't care, but we do need to live, you know.
Dr. Thrilla: *Pessimistic metal clanging*
*A pager goes off, and Dr. Thrilla fumbles around in his scrubs until he finds it. His eyes widen.*
Dr. Thrilla: *Shocked metal clanging*
*He drops the pager, grabs the Thrilla Life outfit, and storms out of the building. Cecil picks the pager up and looks at it.*
Cecil: Holy crap, it's alive.
*He follows the doctor out.*
DIMENSION Z: IT LIVES.
SOMEWHERE
SOMETIME
SOME PLACE
Alex "Meat-Puppet" Smith: Oh, come on! What about me? Don't you care about the zombie? Come on... help a brother out...
*Fade to black.*