Post by BOB legend douja on Nov 19, 2005 0:16:38 GMT -5
(The camera fades in and we see douja, happily floating on a red inner tube in a pool of Ispep Cola. He is wearing red swimming trunks with a Ispep Cola logo, sunglasses, and sipping on a can of Ispep Cola. The Ispep Cola Vending Machine is floating on a raft beside him. The camera fades in as douja takes a long gulp of his Ispep, then holds the can high in the air for the camera to see. A large smile comes across his face that reveals douja to be wearing a platinum grill over his teeth. The Ispep logo is embedded into each tooth with red, blue, and clear jewels. douja lights a blunt and begins to speak.)
douja: i tells ya' what, don't nothin' compare to an ice cold ispep and a blunt on a hot day... what a way to celebrate after kickin' da eva' lovin' shit out of that punk ass washin' machine... after beatin', destroyin', shittin' in, and all around just makin' unit 5 look like an asshole, hopefully he has learned that he just aint ready for da motha' fuckin' boss.. now, after gettin' that petty shit out of da way, it is full speed ahead to grudge match a go go... it will finally be time for me to get my hands on that old, shaky, uncle tom, muhammed ali... it will finally be time for me to get my hands on that diabolical, bitch made, little wang havin', fuck face, by the name of steve studnuts.. most importantly, it will once again be time for me to get my hands on da motha' fuckin' bane of my exsistance, S-M-MOTHA' FUCKIN' P!!! holy fuckin' cow shit do i hate that dastardly son of a motha' fucka... let me be real, i read da message boards... i check the internet sites and shit.. i know what the i-w-kiss my fuckin' ass-c thinks of my black ass... they say i am one of da worst workers of all time.. they say i only got over on a cheap ass novelty gimmick, that it got old 6 years ago, and that my own sense of self worth is completely fucked, and that i have never done a motha' fuckin' thing with my entire life outside of two of the saddest excuses for professional wrestling companies to ever set up a ring and put on a motha' fuckin' show.. yea, bitches, i hear that bullshit... i hear that i have been livin' on one feud for my entire career, that i am one of the worst excuses for a human being to ever step foot into this business.. that i refuse to put over new talent, abuse backstage power, and lower moral every time i walk into the fuckin' locker room... hell, they may be right... shit, i don't even know my partners names, and i could give a fat fuck what they are... but, damnit, this business has made it possible for me to smoke half a pound of reefer a day and fuck 7 to 9 fat, white bitces a day! by god, it is time for me to give back for that!!! it is time for douja to put on da show of a motha' fuckin' lifetime... that is a promise you can take to da motha' fuckin' bank... it is one last moment in da sun, bitches, and i plan on takin' full advantage of da shit!!! i plan on beatin' up an american icon, breaking steve studnuts leg, and pinnin' SMP one last time!!! then, when it is all said and done, i am gonna enjoy and ice cold ISPEP COLA!! it's good ass shit, bitches!!
(Camera fades.)
douja: i tells ya' what, don't nothin' compare to an ice cold ispep and a blunt on a hot day... what a way to celebrate after kickin' da eva' lovin' shit out of that punk ass washin' machine... after beatin', destroyin', shittin' in, and all around just makin' unit 5 look like an asshole, hopefully he has learned that he just aint ready for da motha' fuckin' boss.. now, after gettin' that petty shit out of da way, it is full speed ahead to grudge match a go go... it will finally be time for me to get my hands on that old, shaky, uncle tom, muhammed ali... it will finally be time for me to get my hands on that diabolical, bitch made, little wang havin', fuck face, by the name of steve studnuts.. most importantly, it will once again be time for me to get my hands on da motha' fuckin' bane of my exsistance, S-M-MOTHA' FUCKIN' P!!! holy fuckin' cow shit do i hate that dastardly son of a motha' fucka... let me be real, i read da message boards... i check the internet sites and shit.. i know what the i-w-kiss my fuckin' ass-c thinks of my black ass... they say i am one of da worst workers of all time.. they say i only got over on a cheap ass novelty gimmick, that it got old 6 years ago, and that my own sense of self worth is completely fucked, and that i have never done a motha' fuckin' thing with my entire life outside of two of the saddest excuses for professional wrestling companies to ever set up a ring and put on a motha' fuckin' show.. yea, bitches, i hear that bullshit... i hear that i have been livin' on one feud for my entire career, that i am one of the worst excuses for a human being to ever step foot into this business.. that i refuse to put over new talent, abuse backstage power, and lower moral every time i walk into the fuckin' locker room... hell, they may be right... shit, i don't even know my partners names, and i could give a fat fuck what they are... but, damnit, this business has made it possible for me to smoke half a pound of reefer a day and fuck 7 to 9 fat, white bitces a day! by god, it is time for me to give back for that!!! it is time for douja to put on da show of a motha' fuckin' lifetime... that is a promise you can take to da motha' fuckin' bank... it is one last moment in da sun, bitches, and i plan on takin' full advantage of da shit!!! i plan on beatin' up an american icon, breaking steve studnuts leg, and pinnin' SMP one last time!!! then, when it is all said and done, i am gonna enjoy and ice cold ISPEP COLA!! it's good ass shit, bitches!!
(Camera fades.)