Post by Dave on Aug 26, 2009 14:45:01 GMT -5
Jerri: Whatever, do your worst. You think I haven’t died before?
[Hamster Girl tickles herself with the feather duster.]
HG: Oh come on, it’ll make you laugh!
Jerri: No.
HG: Joe?
[Joe gives Jerri the joint he is smoking.]
Joe: There you go, you’ll survive the torture if you’re stoned.
[Jerri’s lip curls.]
Jerri: How’s that ear by the way?
Joe: Despite the obvious racist overtones of that beatdown you and your freaks gave us… my ear’s fine.
Jerri: It wasn’t racist, it was violent.
Joe: Against a group of black men.
Jerri: Hamster Girl, tickle him instead of me.
HG: No way jose, you’ve got what’s coming to you.
Jerri: Someone give me a rope to hang myself with.
HG: Don’t kill yourself!
[Jerri claws at her wrists as best she can.]
Jerri: This attention is really fucking embarrassing.
HG: It’s only a tease!
Jerri: A tease is taking Scarface from the sandwich stand he’s working for at the beginning of the movie, taking him for stroll through that big fucking mansion, and then sending him back. This is just plain unfair.
Joe: Don’t try and act so high and mighty.
Jerri: Fine, don’t get your tighty whiteys in a bunch. Do your worst.
[Hamster Girl tickles her unmercifully. For the first time in Jerri’s life, she laughs.]
Jerri: Stop!
Joe: Now, we’re not kicking you out of BOB because we don’t like you. We know you’re not racist, because I’ve seen you kissing a black man.
Jerri: I wasn’t kissing him, I was ripping his tongue out with my teeth.
Joe: Whatever. BOB is supposed to be a fun place to wrestle. It’s supposed to be funny. Like the good old days of wrestling where a guy would get into trouble, a heroine would come and save him and he’d tear her clothes off.
Jerri: What’s your point?
Joe: You and your freaks do one thing… be as disgusting, gross and controversial as possible.
Jerri: That’s three things.
HG: What he’s trying to say is BOB shouldn’t have people like you running around in it.
Jerri: People like me?
HG: You know what I mean. Characters who vomit on grannies, cut people up into cubes, talk about raping babies… it’s just not appropriate for family viewing!
Jerri: Fine, we’re leaving.
[Scatman and St. Christian walk in. They grab Hamster Girl by the arms and drag her away.]
Jerri: But not without a sex slave. Joe, you coming?
Joe: Ok!
[The camera focuses on a sunset through the window as the freaks and Joe Bananas drag Hamster Girl away kicking and screaming. The cameraman coughs his hoarse throat away as we slowly fade to black.]
[Hamster Girl tickles herself with the feather duster.]
HG: Oh come on, it’ll make you laugh!
Jerri: No.
HG: Joe?
[Joe gives Jerri the joint he is smoking.]
Joe: There you go, you’ll survive the torture if you’re stoned.
[Jerri’s lip curls.]
Jerri: How’s that ear by the way?
Joe: Despite the obvious racist overtones of that beatdown you and your freaks gave us… my ear’s fine.
Jerri: It wasn’t racist, it was violent.
Joe: Against a group of black men.
Jerri: Hamster Girl, tickle him instead of me.
HG: No way jose, you’ve got what’s coming to you.
Jerri: Someone give me a rope to hang myself with.
HG: Don’t kill yourself!
[Jerri claws at her wrists as best she can.]
Jerri: This attention is really fucking embarrassing.
HG: It’s only a tease!
Jerri: A tease is taking Scarface from the sandwich stand he’s working for at the beginning of the movie, taking him for stroll through that big fucking mansion, and then sending him back. This is just plain unfair.
Joe: Don’t try and act so high and mighty.
Jerri: Fine, don’t get your tighty whiteys in a bunch. Do your worst.
[Hamster Girl tickles her unmercifully. For the first time in Jerri’s life, she laughs.]
Jerri: Stop!
Joe: Now, we’re not kicking you out of BOB because we don’t like you. We know you’re not racist, because I’ve seen you kissing a black man.
Jerri: I wasn’t kissing him, I was ripping his tongue out with my teeth.
Joe: Whatever. BOB is supposed to be a fun place to wrestle. It’s supposed to be funny. Like the good old days of wrestling where a guy would get into trouble, a heroine would come and save him and he’d tear her clothes off.
Jerri: What’s your point?
Joe: You and your freaks do one thing… be as disgusting, gross and controversial as possible.
Jerri: That’s three things.
HG: What he’s trying to say is BOB shouldn’t have people like you running around in it.
Jerri: People like me?
HG: You know what I mean. Characters who vomit on grannies, cut people up into cubes, talk about raping babies… it’s just not appropriate for family viewing!
Jerri: Fine, we’re leaving.
[Scatman and St. Christian walk in. They grab Hamster Girl by the arms and drag her away.]
Jerri: But not without a sex slave. Joe, you coming?
Joe: Ok!
[The camera focuses on a sunset through the window as the freaks and Joe Bananas drag Hamster Girl away kicking and screaming. The cameraman coughs his hoarse throat away as we slowly fade to black.]