Post by sanders on Aug 21, 2009 10:46:46 GMT -5
[Jerri walks into Sanders’ office without knocking.]
Sanders: What do you want?
Jerri: I just got news that me and St. Christian have been scouted by a bigger promotion than BOB.
Sanders: WWE watches BOB?!
Jerri: You think that multi-billion dollar company watches our rinky dink promotion?
Sanders: Wow, you totally just crushed my ego.
Jerri: Anyway, I’m not telling you where we’re going because I don’t want you to follow us.
[Sanders looks crestfallen to say the least.]
Sanders: Fine. Go ahead, ruin my career. I don’t care. It’s not like it was important to me or anything.
[Jerri strokes him on the arm.]
Jerri: I did, however, want to have a last match in BOB. A three way dance…
Sanders: Wait…
Jerri: Between me, Christian St. Christian, and…
[She winks.]
Sanders: HE TOLD YOU?!
[She picks up a bucket of shit and dumps it over his head.]
Jerri: SCATMAN!
[Sanders breathes in and starts rubbing the shit all over himself.]
Sanders: Oh it feels so good!
Jerri: St. Christian told me your dirty little secret. He said he met you back in the 90s at an orgy.
[Sanders stands and finishes getting the shit all over himself before jumping up onto his desk.]
Scatman: Then we spent the next ten years trying to take over the world. Either that or we just wanted to have anal sex with underage Japanese girls.
[He looks at Jerri.]
Scatman: And then we found you, the rarest bloom of them all. I wanted to make you my wife, but it seems St. Christian eventually won your heart.
Jerri: That’s what he thinks.
Scatman: But if it’s not big smelly mountains of shit that turns you on, but instead the ever painful torment of slowly crumbling into rotting meat… then please, except this from me.
[He vomits on her face.]
Scatman: SCATMAN’S BACK BABY!
[Jerri wipes the puke out of her eyes.]
Jerri: Thanks.
Scatman: And he’s here to stay! Put THAT in your pipe and smoke it!
Sanders: What do you want?
Jerri: I just got news that me and St. Christian have been scouted by a bigger promotion than BOB.
Sanders: WWE watches BOB?!
Jerri: You think that multi-billion dollar company watches our rinky dink promotion?
Sanders: Wow, you totally just crushed my ego.
Jerri: Anyway, I’m not telling you where we’re going because I don’t want you to follow us.
[Sanders looks crestfallen to say the least.]
Sanders: Fine. Go ahead, ruin my career. I don’t care. It’s not like it was important to me or anything.
[Jerri strokes him on the arm.]
Jerri: I did, however, want to have a last match in BOB. A three way dance…
Sanders: Wait…
Jerri: Between me, Christian St. Christian, and…
[She winks.]
Sanders: HE TOLD YOU?!
[She picks up a bucket of shit and dumps it over his head.]
Jerri: SCATMAN!
[Sanders breathes in and starts rubbing the shit all over himself.]
Sanders: Oh it feels so good!
Jerri: St. Christian told me your dirty little secret. He said he met you back in the 90s at an orgy.
[Sanders stands and finishes getting the shit all over himself before jumping up onto his desk.]
Scatman: Then we spent the next ten years trying to take over the world. Either that or we just wanted to have anal sex with underage Japanese girls.
[He looks at Jerri.]
Scatman: And then we found you, the rarest bloom of them all. I wanted to make you my wife, but it seems St. Christian eventually won your heart.
Jerri: That’s what he thinks.
Scatman: But if it’s not big smelly mountains of shit that turns you on, but instead the ever painful torment of slowly crumbling into rotting meat… then please, except this from me.
[He vomits on her face.]
Scatman: SCATMAN’S BACK BABY!
[Jerri wipes the puke out of her eyes.]
Jerri: Thanks.
Scatman: And he’s here to stay! Put THAT in your pipe and smoke it!