Post by MMR1 "Re-Generation-X" on Jul 10, 2007 13:26:27 GMT -5
(Camera pans across a picture perfect community in Fayetteville Georgia, crossing right up Green Meadow Lane all the way to 129 Green Meadow Lane where we see not one but two familiar faces.)
MMR1: Dude I can’t believe Bob’s is so cheap they wouldn’t even pay for a bus ticket to MAYhem in Mayday.
Jim: No kidding, I thought for sure we would at least get a cab ride. I mean who the hell do those guys think we are?
MMR1: Yeah, I mean I am a former OWTTM Champion and you, well you were there too.
Jim: Dude you need to watch your step.
MMR1: I know man you won some belts too.
Jim: No man, I mean you really need to watch your…
(squish, Massive man steps in a massive pile of dog crap.)
MMR1: Oh come on!
Jim: (laughing) Dude that sucks.
MMR1: Shut up, man.
Jim: Alright, buddy. I gotta take a leak, I’m gonna see if there is anyone home over here.
MMR1: Over where?
Jim: Over here where I physically am.
(Massive Man looks at the homes address)
MMR1: So would you say that "My physical address is 130 Green Meadow Lane, Fayetteville Georgia. 30215''.
Jim: Sure, if I was writing some kind of creepy text message.
(Jim knocks on the front door and it swings open.)
Jim: Hello?…Hello? Anyone home? I just gotta take a pee.
(Massive Man pushes past him into the house)
MMR1: No one’s home lets just make ourselves at home, you pee I’ll look around and then we’ll go.
Jim: Sounds cool.
(Jim runs upstairs to find a bathroom as Massive Man starts looking around.)
MMR1: (yelling) Man, do you smell that? Smells like someone died in here.
Jim: (yelling) Sorry dude that’s me I kinda felt like dropping a deuce.
MMR1: For crying out loud. (yelling) how about a courtesy flush? Hey! This guy has a portable weight machine. (stops yelling) Weird all the cords are stretched out.
(Flush)
Jim: When these people get home there are gonna have a big surprise when they get home. I would wouldn’t be surprised if they all suffocate.
MMR1: Dude check this out all the cords are screwed up on this machine. This dude probably has a kid who messed around with his shit.
Jim: Boy is that kid gonna be sorry.
MMR1: No kidding, if it were my kid I’d probably wrap my arms around his neck until he stopped moving.
Jim: Hey man I’m getting kinda thirsty, you think these people would mind if I got something to drink?
MMR1: Who cares if they’d mind its not like they’re gonna come home in some kind of blind rage and kill us.
(Jim walks over to a picture on the wall.)
Jim: Dude, check out this signed pictured.
MMR1: Wow, Hugh Jackman?!?
Jim: Yeah, he’s great in X-Men. But what’s that in his mouth?
MMR1: Could be a “Got Milk?” ad. Or he has rabies?
Jim: I didn’t think Wolverine could get rabies. Weird.
(Massive Man and Jim move to the kitchen. Jim opens the fridge.)
Jim: Wow! That is a lot of juice.
MMR1: Well these do seem like the people who like to do their juice.
(Jim pours himself a glass and drinks it.)
Jim: I am totally juiced up, I feel so strong and alive.
(Massive man yelling from the other room)
MMR1: Jim check this out.
Jim: What?
MMR1: Dude I know you’re into religion and I respect that about you, but can you tell me for what reason there would be two bibles just lying on the floor in here?
Jim: Well I’m not really sure but we can always think about that while we continue our walk to…where is MAYhem in Mayday again?
MMR1: Dude I thought you knew, I mean I was following you.
Jim: Oh we are so lost.
MMR1: No way man we are fine…the disembodied narrator would never let us get lost.
( Sorry guys I was following you both, I never thought to see where MAYhem in Mayday was actually gonna be. However I did see that you are both without matches.)
MMR1: What! This is the worst tragedy I have ever heard of, I bet when Nancy Grace hears about this most saddening event she will spend days…nah…weeks talking about it, bring in our family, friends and co-workers to talk about this grave booking error.
(Jim picks up a letter from a table while Massive man is going on with his self-indulgent rant.)
Jim: Uh, dude check out this letter.
MMR1: What about it?
Jim: The name read the name.
MMR1: Ben…
Jim: Sorry let me move my thumb.
MMR1: oit…Benoit…oh my god….
(Massive man and Jim look up from the letter and look towards each other.)
MMR1 and Jim: CANADIANS!!!
(Like Shaggy and Scooby from a haunted mansion Massive Man and Jim book it out of that house and back to hunting for the elusive match at MAYhem in Mayday. Until Next Time…fade to black)
MMR1: Dude I can’t believe Bob’s is so cheap they wouldn’t even pay for a bus ticket to MAYhem in Mayday.
Jim: No kidding, I thought for sure we would at least get a cab ride. I mean who the hell do those guys think we are?
MMR1: Yeah, I mean I am a former OWTTM Champion and you, well you were there too.
Jim: Dude you need to watch your step.
MMR1: I know man you won some belts too.
Jim: No man, I mean you really need to watch your…
(squish, Massive man steps in a massive pile of dog crap.)
MMR1: Oh come on!
Jim: (laughing) Dude that sucks.
MMR1: Shut up, man.
Jim: Alright, buddy. I gotta take a leak, I’m gonna see if there is anyone home over here.
MMR1: Over where?
Jim: Over here where I physically am.
(Massive Man looks at the homes address)
MMR1: So would you say that "My physical address is 130 Green Meadow Lane, Fayetteville Georgia. 30215''.
Jim: Sure, if I was writing some kind of creepy text message.
(Jim knocks on the front door and it swings open.)
Jim: Hello?…Hello? Anyone home? I just gotta take a pee.
(Massive Man pushes past him into the house)
MMR1: No one’s home lets just make ourselves at home, you pee I’ll look around and then we’ll go.
Jim: Sounds cool.
(Jim runs upstairs to find a bathroom as Massive Man starts looking around.)
MMR1: (yelling) Man, do you smell that? Smells like someone died in here.
Jim: (yelling) Sorry dude that’s me I kinda felt like dropping a deuce.
MMR1: For crying out loud. (yelling) how about a courtesy flush? Hey! This guy has a portable weight machine. (stops yelling) Weird all the cords are stretched out.
(Flush)
Jim: When these people get home there are gonna have a big surprise when they get home. I would wouldn’t be surprised if they all suffocate.
MMR1: Dude check this out all the cords are screwed up on this machine. This dude probably has a kid who messed around with his shit.
Jim: Boy is that kid gonna be sorry.
MMR1: No kidding, if it were my kid I’d probably wrap my arms around his neck until he stopped moving.
Jim: Hey man I’m getting kinda thirsty, you think these people would mind if I got something to drink?
MMR1: Who cares if they’d mind its not like they’re gonna come home in some kind of blind rage and kill us.
(Jim walks over to a picture on the wall.)
Jim: Dude, check out this signed pictured.
MMR1: Wow, Hugh Jackman?!?
Jim: Yeah, he’s great in X-Men. But what’s that in his mouth?
MMR1: Could be a “Got Milk?” ad. Or he has rabies?
Jim: I didn’t think Wolverine could get rabies. Weird.
(Massive Man and Jim move to the kitchen. Jim opens the fridge.)
Jim: Wow! That is a lot of juice.
MMR1: Well these do seem like the people who like to do their juice.
(Jim pours himself a glass and drinks it.)
Jim: I am totally juiced up, I feel so strong and alive.
(Massive man yelling from the other room)
MMR1: Jim check this out.
Jim: What?
MMR1: Dude I know you’re into religion and I respect that about you, but can you tell me for what reason there would be two bibles just lying on the floor in here?
Jim: Well I’m not really sure but we can always think about that while we continue our walk to…where is MAYhem in Mayday again?
MMR1: Dude I thought you knew, I mean I was following you.
Jim: Oh we are so lost.
MMR1: No way man we are fine…the disembodied narrator would never let us get lost.
( Sorry guys I was following you both, I never thought to see where MAYhem in Mayday was actually gonna be. However I did see that you are both without matches.)
MMR1: What! This is the worst tragedy I have ever heard of, I bet when Nancy Grace hears about this most saddening event she will spend days…nah…weeks talking about it, bring in our family, friends and co-workers to talk about this grave booking error.
(Jim picks up a letter from a table while Massive man is going on with his self-indulgent rant.)
Jim: Uh, dude check out this letter.
MMR1: What about it?
Jim: The name read the name.
MMR1: Ben…
Jim: Sorry let me move my thumb.
MMR1: oit…Benoit…oh my god….
(Massive man and Jim look up from the letter and look towards each other.)
MMR1 and Jim: CANADIANS!!!
(Like Shaggy and Scooby from a haunted mansion Massive Man and Jim book it out of that house and back to hunting for the elusive match at MAYhem in Mayday. Until Next Time…fade to black)